War veteran recovers, marries...

Making fun of a disabled veteran is not my style, but maybe you heard about the guy who came back home from the war after being blown up by an RPG. The surgeons put him back together as best they could. He was in the hospital recovering for months and his high school sweetheart read about his heroism in the local paper so she visited him. They slowly fell in love and as the day of his release came he proposed to her and she accepted. On their honeymoon night he was nervous as the doctors told him everything would "work right", and in practice it did! So, she was waiting in bed and when he took off his clothes she screamed. The surgeons had reconnected his penis to his right hip!
"Oh my god! What the...? No way baby, that's crazy!" she screamed as he swayed side to side as if he was doing the 'bump', demonstrating how it was going to happen.
"No, don't be afraid, it works fine! We can still have children! The doctor said so!" he said.
She shook her head and demanded he put his clothes back on, that he was a "freak" and they would have to get an immediate divorce. He thought for a moment and pointed to his left armpit and told her,
"Kiss my ass bitch!"